Clinic Dialogs

Please don't read this if you don't have a sense of humor.  This post will be littered with strange and random inside jokes and please excuse the inappropriate and rather semi-lude parts, but you must admit,"Its pretty darn funny."

Overheard: "Hey, what breed is a C. Rex? Is that like a T. Rex?  Do I have to treat that cat?"  (This was particularly funny because the cat is a lunatic.)

Out on a house call with our technician, Josh, two owners and a farrier:
Josh: "Doc, look over there.  C'mon, turn around."  Me: "I don't need to see that, Josh."  Me later: "Ooohh noooo.  My eyes.. " (after accidently getting a glimpse of the farrier's horrendous plumber's crack).  "Chink strap and plumber's crack is less than ideal."

Farrier to Josh when I am writing up the ticket at the truck: "Hey man, are you her boyfriend?"  Josh: (with a manic expression) "NO!  Geez, I just work with her." 

What Josh should have said, "No, but she has one and he carries a gun (and pulls up his pants)."

Josh later: "You put baby powder in that big of a crack, at the end of the day you'll have biscuits."


Vet clinic humor:
Amanda: "It smells like poop in here.  I think someone crop-dusted."

Josh: "You know you're in trouble when you are taking an elderly person to the hospital from the nursing home, they have a foley catheter, and the bag looks like egg drop soup - all those little things floating around in it."

Josh to Amanda: "If I say, "ding, ding" that means watch out for bolts."  Amanda: "What?"